


Body and Soul

by Astrumiel, sasstrick



Category: Cut & Run - Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux
Genre: Body Swap, Comedy, Funny, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-02
Updated: 2015-12-02
Packaged: 2018-05-04 12:23:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5333972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Astrumiel/pseuds/Astrumiel, https://archiveofourown.org/users/sasstrick/pseuds/sasstrick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt by Anonymous: One day, Zane wakes up and finds out Nick is lying beside him, not Ty. Few minute later Zane figures out that he is in Nick's boat, not in his home, and in the mirror he sees Kelly's face instead of his. Probably Kelly is in his body.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt from tumblr, part 3 will come in a week or two!

Zane woke slowly, sun on his face and warmth radiating through his body. He felt a little floaty. Light. It was an odd feeling. His body didn’t have the usual aches and pains as it usually did and he stretched, enjoying the feeling of the sheets moving against his naked skin.

He felt the slow drag of an arm sliding over his torso and pull him close, the body was hard and welcoming as he settled against him.

“Morning,” He whispered, opening his eyes and looking over to his bedmate.

And almost choking.

“Morning,” Nick smirked sleepily, pressing his nose and lips to Zane’s cheek and nuzzling there. Zane swallowed against the panic and looked around the bedroom on The Fiddler. What in the fucking hell.

Nick’s hand began to ghost down Zane’s stomach to something not so private and Zane had never moved so fast in his life.

“I need to call Ty,” He mumbled, taking the sheet with him and using it to cover himself.

“What?” Nick asked, confused. He tugged at the sheet, making Zane fall back into the mattress and Nick ran one hand over his shoulder and another around his torso, sliding down to cup him through the sheet.

“Nope,” Zane gasped, standing back up, grabbing the phone on the side table and booking it the fuck out of there.

“Come on babe you love morning sex,” Nick groaned. “And that’s my phone,” He mumbled, falling back onto the bed with a sigh. Zane shut the door behind him and practically ran to the bathroom.

The phone was ringing when he looked up into the mirror and gave the most unmanly screech he’d ever heard.

“Kelly?” Ty wondered from the phone and Zane dropped it, moving closer to look at himself. Oh god. What the hell. WHAT THE HELL.

“I NEED TO TALK TO ZANE,” Zane practically yelled, looking down at his naked body and then back up, cringing.

“What? God what the hell is wrong with you guys, you’re both being fucking weird,” Ty growled and moved to give Kelly…Zane? The phone.

“Dude,” Kelly said into the phone and Zane cursed.

“What the fuck happened,” Zane asked, frowning at his reflection.

“No idea. But dude, you’re hung like a god damn bull, how do you walk with this thing?” 

“Oh my god,” Zane groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose and clenching his eyes shut.

“Seriously man!” Kelly gasped. “It’s not even hard I don’t know where to stuff it,” He complained and Zane just shook his head and rubbed a hand over his face.

“What do we do? How did this happen?” He asked desperately.

“Kels?” Nick asked through the door, trying to open it. Zane’s hand shot out and held it closed. Who doesn’t have a lock on their bathroom doors?

“Be right out!” Zane called, voice a little too high.

“Oh my god, he tried to sex you, didn’t he? Nicko loves his mornings,” Kelly laughed through the phone and Zane practically growled.

“Should we tell them?” Kelly asked. “Does Ty bottom because I need to know how this thing fits.”

“Please stop commenting on my goods,” Zane begged.

“I’m just curious!” Kelly defended. “Okay, okay. What did you do last night? Maybe we synced up on something weird?” Kelly asked.

“I don’t know. We went out to eat? Watched some TV. I read a book?” Zane offered, at a loss. Nick was saying something on the other side of the door but Zane wasn’t listening. “You?” He asked.

“Well, we attempted to watch TV,” Kelly mumbled, smile clear in his voice.

“Jesus Christ,” Zane groaned.

“KELLY!” Nick yelled through the door.

“WHAT!” Zane yelled back.

“Hey, don’t be mean to my lover,” Kelly teased.

“You didn’t eat any of those cookies Digger sent did you?” He called through the door.

“Fuck,” Zane gasped. They had Digger’s cookies? Ty got a box yesterday that Zane dug into.

“Cookies,” Kelly mused.

Zane jerked the door open and grabbed at the phone in Nick’s hand.

“Why are you being so weird!” Nick gasped as Zane slammed the door back into his face.

“Digger, what the hell!” He accused into the phone. Kelly snickered into his other ear.

“Well that answers that question,” Digger chuckled. “Sorry son, Momma sent out the wrong batch.”

Zane looked skyward. And fainted.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 3 in the next week or 2!

Ty watched Zane from his place on the couch. He was being extremely weird. More so than usual. Ty knew something was off the moment he woke up and Zane was complaining profusely about the aches and pains in his body. And when he went to go to the bathroom… Yeah that was weird.

When he hung up the phone, an odd, amused smile on his face, Ty glared.

“Cookies?” Ty asked. Zane froze, glancing over his shoulder and looked as if he was pondering something. Ty crossed his arms and glared harder.

“Ah… Yeah those weird ones Digger sent us?” Zane offered.

“What the hell is going on Garrett?” Ty accused and the man fluttered about. His eyes trailed off to where Cricket was prowling and his eyes lit up.

“Kitty,” He murmured, picking her up and holding her to his face. What the hell.

“Ok who are you,” Ty asked flatly. Zane’s face was pure denial as he sputtered and Ty hopped up and prowled towards him. Zane swallowed, letting the cat go as Ty backed him into the wall, pressing his body against his.

“We should take a road trip, go see Digger,” Zane offered nervously. He was trying to keep a smile down and Ty nodded, pressing closer to nuzzle at his neck.

“First I think we should take this upstairs,” Ty said, voice rough, grinding against him. Zane snorted hard and loud and erupted into a fit of laughter.

“OH MY GOD I CAN’T I’M SORRY,” He exclaimed, pushing Ty away and doubling over. “Oh my god, DO YOU REALLY TALK LIKE THAT?” He wheezed, clutching at his abdomen. “Jesus Christ, why don’t you guys do yoga, this body sucks!” He complained, rolling his neck.

Ty took a step back, unsure how to handle this. He looked like Zane. He was Zane. But he wasn’t acting like it. Part of Ty wanted to hold a knife to the guy’s jugular until he told the truth and part of him couldn’t because this was his husband.

“What’s going on?” He asked, dropping his hands and watching as Zane looked around, searching for an answer. He made an unsure noise in his throat and groaned.

“Not sure?” He tried. Ty raised an eyebrow. “I’m still pretty sure I’m dreaming. Is the sun made of pot?”

“Why are you talking like Kelly?” Ty sighed.

“Yes!” Zane pointed, eyes lit with excitement. “I am Kelly!” He exclaimed. “Those cookies! The cookies Digger sent. Momma Digger sent the wrong batch!” He shouted. Ty frowned, backing away and picking up his cats as he went.

“Oh come on man it really is me!”

“I sincerely doubt that.” Ty said backing away further.

“I can prove it.”

Ty gave him a look between total distrust and interest.

Zane worried his lip a moment, his hands fluttering nervously before his eyes lit and he snapped his fingers at Ty.

“Remember that time I had to stitch your dic-”

“Okay!” Ty shouted, images of that very unfortunate night flashed through his mind and he cringed as certain… appendages twitched from ghost pains.

“Do you believe me now!?” Zane exclaimed and Ty practically hissed.

“Fucking Digger,” He muttered, pacing away from Zane. “Fine, I’ll play along, what’s the plan?” He growled, going for his shirt because he wasn’t getting laid anytime soon.

“Nick and Zane are on their way down here, Digger is catching the next flight in,” He told him and Ty nodded. “Ok but I need you to settle my curiosity because this thing is crazy big man!” Zane exclaimed and Ty threw his hands over his ears and stalked away.

“Nope!” He shouted.

“IT’S PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE!” Zane continued and Ty locked himself in the bedroom.

“NOT ONE MORE WORD DAMNIT!” Ty yelled from behind the closed door, if the stitches incident didn’t go to prove that wasn’t actually his Zane in the livingroom that last comment sure as hell did. This was so weird, like bad teen movie weird. Or a bad porno.

Ty didn’t leave his room until the doorbell rang, shooting Zane…. or Kelly?? a slightly apologetic look that quickly turned to confusion then angry arousal when he saw what the man had decided to do to pass the time.

Bendy, stretchy near-nude yoga.

Seriously screw this guy. As soon as they fixed this whole mess Ty was dragging his actual husband to bed and they were going to take this day’s frustration out on each other.

The doorbell rang again and Ty sighed before heading towards the stairs.

“Put a goddamn shirt on Doc!” He yelled before heading down.

He expected arguing when he opened the door to find that apparently Digger had caught the other two at the airport. Instead Nick just looked tired and frustrated, Digger was busy texting someone that Ty desperately hoped was his own mother.

Ty had barely settled his eyes on Kelly before the man was pushing into the house and wrapping around Ty like a fucking monkey.

“Jesus,” Ty laughed and Nick looked on confused if he should be pulling him off or not. Ty patted his hands on Kelly’s back and held him tight, feeling awkward, but wanting to comfort his husband. “You miss me that bad, Lonestar?”

“No,” Ty frowned comically and Digger barked a laugh. “Being short is literally the worst thing to have ever happened to me, this is abuse,” He muttered.

“Ok first of all rude!” Zane’s voice carried from the staircase, “Second of all it’s a technical advantage, I can still kick all of your asses and third of all?” He paused. “ Third of all, dude being short is way better than being creakier than a damn rocking chair. Seriously man you have a great body but stretch it out on occasion. Shit if this is what old age looks like I think I’ll pass.” Kelly complained almost walking into the counter, unused to the body he was in and misjudging his steps. Then he looked up and spotted Nick in the door.

“Oh hey babe.”

Nick looked mortified for a moment before something in him softened, almost like he could see Kelly peeking through Zane’s eyes.

“Hey,” Nick smiled, feeling immensely better with Kelly now truly with him. 

“I missed you, Nicko.” He said then took a step over, crossing a good yard or two in just that one step, and hugged Nick, picking him up off the floor with his enthusiasm.

Nick let out a surprised yelp when his gleeful boyfriend stuck in the body of his best friend’s husband used his new height to his advantage.

“Ah Kels?” He managed.

“Sorry, just happy to see you.” Kelly said letting him down, he put his lips next to Nick’s ear and whispered. “Just you wait till we’re alone, I’ve got so many things I want you to do to me.”

Nick was absolutely red when he pulled back, it was downright weird to hear those words coming out of Zane’s mouth, even if they were Kelly’s thoughts. Beside him Ty tried to hold back a laugh while Kelly rolled his eyes in a very Zane like way.

“Alright, enough flirtin’ let’s get this show on the road before I witness something unholy.” Digger said finally looking up from his phone.

“Right.” Nick nodded walking into the room, cheeks still pink.

“By the way, what did he finally say to convince you?” Zane in Kelly’s body asked Ty sounding genuinely curious.

“Nope.”

“I can just ask him instead.” Zane said glancing over where Kelly was standing in Zane’s body and staring back at Ty. “That is the weirdest thing ever, like suddenly discovering I have a taller twin.” He muttered. “Does my hair really look like that? I need a haircut.”

“Stitches-” Kelly started, but Ty gave a shout to cut him off and he faced Digger.

“What’s the plan?” He asked. Digger chuckled and held up his bag.

“Let’s get to cookin, brother,” He winked and headed for the kitchen.

Three bad batches, a gallon of vinegar, and some cat hair later, Digger was pouring glasses.

“What is with Cajuns and cats, man,” Ty whined, looking at the steaming concoctions and thanking god he didn’t have to drink it.

“Alright boys, pretty simple. Drink up and then you gotta kiss,” Digger smiled, crossing his arms proudly.

“Kiss?” All four of them exclaimed in unison and Digger let off a boisterous laugh.

“You want back into the bodies you was birthed in?” He asked. Kelly’s body sneered and shook his head, while Zane’s just smiled, reaching for the glass with grabby hands.

“I’ve always wanted to kiss myself.”

“You would,” Nick muttered.

“Let’s get this over with,” Zane muttered and reached for a glass.

“Bottoms up bitch.” Kelly mock toasted while Nick let out a cough that sounded suspiciously like a laugh. They both grimaced as it hit their tongues.


End file.
